Well, I've learned from some serious trial-by-fire, how to navigate the dating sphere. Sure, I still screw up most of the time, but I think I have a pretty good handle on what you should do and say when chatting with other gays! That being said, I've compiled this little ultimate guide for those who are struggling to navigate or who just want a second opinion on their decisions!
Like I mentioned before, I'm not always right. No one can be! But after serving as the resident advice-giver to my friends and to various people on the internet, I feel as if I'm not only qualified but obligated to share my expertise when it comes to dating online within the gay community. Here is my ultimate guide to all the gay chat apps out there: If you haven't noticed, there are a million dating apps and sites out there.
All of which are vying for your business. So which companies are actually worth your time and money? I've done a little poking around both for business and for pleasure , and these are the conclusions I came to:.
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If you haven't heard of Grindr, you must not only be a baby gay, but you must have just hatched because there's no way you haven't heard of Grindr. This app is one of the leading apps out there for gay chatting and hooking up. I'd say that Grindr is the gay equivalent to Tinder in that everyone has tried it and probably still has it downloaded on their phone even if they insist they don't use it anymore. Though, if you've ever used Grindr, you'll know that - unlike Tinder - the app doesn't bother masquerading as a dating app.
People who use Grindr know exactly what they're using Grindr to get: And there's no harm in that so long as you're safe about who you talk to, what information you send, and who you decide to meet up with! The same goes for all other dating and hookup apps. You'll also find a lot of people on Grindr who are looking for people who fit a specific physical demographic think fit, white, and masculine.
There's a lot of discrimination in the gay community which is evident on Grindr. Scruff seems to be the inclusive response to Grindr. While Grindr will always be a staple in the online gay dating and chatting community, Scruff is looking to create a slightly more inclusive space. They also have Scruff sponsored events and an entire section on their site that helps assist with planning a literal gay-cation - one that avoids non-gay-friendly places, unlike the journey Ellen Page went on for her series of the same name for Vice.
Scruff isn't just a gay chat app; it's a community! I recommend this app for all you baby-gays out there; this will help you get in touch with your local gay community as well as help you navigate gay events and travel in general! Why complicate things? Gay Chat App is exactly what it says it is: While I like that Scruff built out from their original goal of simply connecting gays on a one-on-one level to facilitating community, I like that this app keeps things simple!
And honestly, in the digital age simplicity is something we all strive for in any kind of technology - especially dating apps! Dating is complicated enough, the last things we need are useless features and screens to make it increasingly more difficult. For all of those of you who have slightly darker tastes when it comes to relationships and sex, this one's for you!
Sure, Fetlife is a site that caters to people of all genders and sexualities, but there's no denying that the gay community is thriving on this site. If you want to be linked to other gay people within the kink community, you HAVE to get a Fetlife account. I recommend having other accounts on dating apps in conjunction with your Fetlife account. Kink can't be your entire life, but it should be a huge part of it if you're into it. Obviously, you don't have to use a dating app to find love or sex, or conversation. You have to remember that there was a point in time before the internet where people met organically and in person!
While I don't think you should completely abandon dating apps, you can at least use social media to your advantage! Because you don't have to get a match or alike to slide into someone's DMs and start a conversation. I know that there's a lot of fear attached to rejection, but the worst thing that can happen is you get turned down, or you gain a platonic friend!
And in my opinion, that chance is well worth the emotional risk. The places where you have the most likely chance of meeting and chatting with someone are on Twitter, Instagram, and Tumblr. I recommend putting your accounts on public on these platforms so that you can get fresh eyes on your face or other parts of your body Don't be afraid to interact with people who follow you or who are your followers; this will make you more comfortable with flirting with them in the future.
A lot of people meet people on social media sites!
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When it comes to making the first move, we all hope that the other person will do the hard work for us. I know that at least for me I don't send the first message because of a combination of being nervous and being afraid of rejection. When you first come across someone's profile, you can never be sure if they'll get your humor or respond well to your first message. It's scary! Putting yourself out there is hard! While I may not always send the first message I, in theory, know what makes a good one!
It all depends on what kind of tone you're trying to set. If you want to start out flirty in hopes your conversation will lead to something steamier, then you should go that route! Our number one pick goes to Plenty of Fish for covering the most bases. Its huge pool of singles and strategic new conversation features put it at the top.
For privacy-weary sexters, our favorite is Confide , which we like for their Screenshield technology. More on that later. Kaboom takes the easy-access trophy, since it works on more or less any social media platform, so you can sext using whichever site you're already most comfortable using.
While all of these options give you a great and in some cases a more private opportunity to exchange flirty messages, it's important to remember a few basic rules: No app can completely protect your privacy for you — that's your job. For example, someone doesn't need to take a screenshot to capture a picture you send.
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They could easily just use another phone or device to snap or record whatever you send. You should always keep this in mind before sending anything that could be compromising, and do your best to make sure you trust the person who's receiving your messages. Assess the situation and know your audience. Usually it doesn't take much more than a few pre-sext texts or pre-sexts to gauge whether or not someone is interested in doing the cyber-dirty with you. Take the time to figure that out before you lead with something raunchy and uncalled-for. AKA don't just start throwing dick pics at people left and right if they didn't ask.
follow site Be respectful: Privacy is sacred. The internet has the scary ability to make fleeting moments very permanent. If someone asks you to keep something to yourself, you better do it. While sexting can be light and fun, it also requires a serious level of trust.
If you betray that trust, you're ruining it for everybody. Real-life dating is obviously the best way to get to know somebody long term, especially if you're looking for any kind of serious, in-person relationship. And real sex will always be better than sexting.
Whether you plan on actually wining and dining your date or just meeting to hook up, it always requires some extra effort. For those with super hectic schedules or those who just don't have room in their life for whatever reason for a steady in-person relationship, sexting is practically a saving grace. After all, your sex drive doesn't go away just because you're busy. Sexting allows you to take care of your sexual needs without putting yourself out. As is the case with most behind-the-screen activities, with sexting, you can let go of your inhibitions a bit and feel more comfortable exploring your sexual side knowing there's a certain barrier between you and the other person.
We've touched on the reasons why sexting might not be completely safe in terms of privacy, but to its credit, sexting offers an element of safety that in-person meetings don't. Sexting allows you to interact with both people you know and total strangers without putting yourself in dangerous or unwanted physical situations. Your experience should always be what you want it to be, and with sexting, if it's not going in the direction you want, it's just a matter of closing an app.
We're using cookies to improve your experience. Click Here to find out more. Like Follow Follow. For those who want to get to know their partner. The Good. Plenty of Fish It's not connected to your social media, so Plenty of Fish offers that extra bit of anonymity. Basic membership: Free 2-months: The breakdown: Plenty of Fish really has all the makings of a great sexting app.
First off all, its reported registered user-base is over million worldwide, with 57 million connections made every week.